Emerge - Ramble Three
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During our second month of emerging together you shared your thoughts around the question, ‘To what degree are you conscious that a window of opportunity is closing?’ Well, heads up. This is a long one. You resonated with this question and had much to say in response to it. As my mother always says in the subject line of her emails, Brew a cup of tea or pour a glass of wine, and settle in.
Many of you chose to question the question itself, which I LOVED!
Michael: It's easy to think that the window may be closing but I'm afraid that's a cop out. If the window of one thing is closing, I choose to find another window that is open.
Right? I mean, I randomly chose a six month time period for Emerge based on what we knew, and what we were told on the date I launched the project. Meanwhile, the ground shifts daily, and while the number of COVID cases and deaths are currently on a steady decline here in the U.S. this was exactly the case this time last year, and other countries are in the throes of a second deadly surge. So the concept of an ‘ending,’ a ‘window of opportunity’ closing, feels like a false construct. Which it is. Like time itself. Based on the roller coaster of the past 15 months, how could we possibly know what September will look like? COVID has reminded us, harshly, that we are not in control. Humans have had a long overdue ego check. Amen.
Malcolm: Only uncertainty is certain.
Lisa: I don't see it so much as a window of opportunity closing, but more as ongoing uncertainty.
Kristin and Su take this one step further. Kristin: Hum… this question stumped me. I don't see, in any way, the "window of opportunity closing." The process of evaluation IS just that, a process. And for me anyway, it isn't dictated by a 'maybe' deadline. It's about a serious framework of time to make considerations on which you base new, updated decisions. Even if those "decisions" change again in the future.
Su: As COVID has unfolded I have been wondering when there might be an "end". I'm starting to think that the real point is that opportunity is always there for the taking. We make our own opportunities. Before I lost my job I would have taken time to consider possibilities and planned to make a change. When I find and/or create new work for myself I hope that I will see it as fluid and changeable in a way that I wasn't able to see before.
While COVID may have put us in our place, perpetual uncertainty and not-knowing have always been constants. As humans, we impose deadlines or end dates to give us structure, and a sense of safety and direction. Trumpets sound... we arrive at this month’s first polarity moment!!! Arbitrary timelines have many benefits, including giving us a way to organize our time, energy, work, and resources towards a given task. AND, they clearly give us a false sense of security so that when our best laid plans are interrupted, or even destroyed, we can be devastated. To be derailed as a result of a deadline that wasn't a real thing in the first place means that we have much work to do to embrace the fact that life continuously cycles between joy and sorrow and that this is how we learn and grow. Is this the ultimate challenge of living?
Polarity moment number two! It is up to us to remain in a state of perpetual learning and self-improvement. AND, for some people, a disruption, such as one caused by a pandemic, an illness, the death of a loved one, or a youngest child leaving for college, is necessary or at least extremely helpful in creating the impetus and conditions for change. These people are more likely therefore to feel a window of opportunity closing.
Debbie: At times I panic I might already be falling behind on seizing the opportunity to build my new direction up to the level I need. I’ve made very big changes this past year, but they are much slower than changes I made in my previous life. The paradox is I LIKE the slowness and I actually want that as one of the big changes I’m making in my life, but I’m worried the world around me will speed up again and not accommodate my needs.
Jennifer: Only in the last couple of weeks have I begun to feel a little haunted by this sense of closing. I am eager and anxious to sustain the gifts of the pause. I endeavor to trust in myself that I can bring a certain awareness, presence, discipline, and even resistance to my former state of being, the state of being called to constant performance and doing.
Beth feels the tension between the idea of a window of opportunity closing and the arbitrariness of the timeline acutely: I am very conscious of a closing window of opportunity. At times I have a romanticized view of our pandemic time as a family (have I taken this opportunity to be closer to my kids?), as a skill-acquirer (have I developed myself enough?), and as an employed person (what new knowledge can I take into my work life?). And the underpinning of all of these questions is “enough.” The closing window is a constructed deadline and this “enough” is a constructed quality measure. I am trying to let these constructs go.
Jordan: Ooooh, interesting question. I've been trying to "live in the moment" and not worry too much about the future, but how can one do that when the window is closing?!
The next three contributors focus on the larger societal system level - humanity. This time last year, I remember saying to my partner “I’d love to think we will learn from this, but I’m sad to say I’m not optimistic.” We are by nature deeply egotistical and fearful, and therefore protect our own interests fiercely. I sense that we will get swept up in the relief, that we will go back to consuming, caring mostly for our own, and behaving in ways that deepen the divide between those that have and those that don’t, and those that can and those that can’t. I’m sorry. I know that’s dark, and I cannot tell you how much I want to be proved wrong. I am heartened by your contributions to this project as they show that we are becoming more self-aware, intentional and making incremental changes one day at a time. I am hopeful that this bite size, individual systems approach will impact the larger playing field. To close out, I am going to share the next three submissions verbatim, and then pose Ramble Three’s question.
Leslie: I am acutely conscious of it. Have been since about a year ago when - after a month of people seeming to be together in working to contain COVID and protect essential workers and vulnerable people - a large faction broke off, refused to wear masks or stay away from others, and deliberately did everything they could to spread a disease they believed was a hoax. What was behind it was so obviously the exploiter-class's need to obscure what we learned in the first months of the pandemic: that we can take care of everyone if we want, that there is enough to go around, that the world is not going to end if we reorganize in ways that will keep people fed, housed, and safe. We could have rebalanced work and life for parents. Instead, so far, we have allocated the burden of caregiving to women and punished them at their jobs for giving that care. We are more divided than ever. The only things I see that might change permanently are the growing awareness of workers that the owners need them more than they need the owners and the realization that health (mental and physical) and hygiene and manners are connected and crucial.
Su: I am more concerned about the window of opportunity for society to make critical changes. Collectively, we humans tend to rise to the occasion when times are tough and then settle back into old, familiar routines when challenges abate. I am wondering if we will be able to reimagine education, equity, justice, climate regulation, and work/life balance with the lessons learned from COVID in mind, and move forward with a sense that change is ongoing and essential for growth.
Ashley: I will be happy if I can continue to maximize the opportunity for personal and communal growth over the next few months, while continuing to exercise the almost obligatory practicum of forgiveness for self and others during such a challenging time. These things are perennial and are the rock of solid ground that we all seek in our fragile humanity. They have carried me through life and the pandemic; and will carry me ever onward. In this sense nothing has really changed during the pandemic. The Work is ever before us. But the pandemic has perhaps in its own way served to sharpen, focus, and brighten us. In this we may be heartened, we who have, in fact, survived.
Thank you Ramble Two contributors. Grateful.
We are going to have some fun with the Ramble Three question, or should I say exercise. KEEP or DUMP? Consider doing this one with a friend, spouse, or as a family. Grab a piece of paper and divide it into two halves. On the left hand side, list all the behaviors, ways of being, and habits that you have developed during COVID that you plan on keeping. On the right hand side, list those you can’t wait to DUMP. Once you are done, transfer them over to the google form below. It’s as simple as that. If you are a first time rambler, it’s never too late to join us.
See you in June and thanks for rambling with me and each other.